


A Daffodil for New Beginnings

by neitherbluenorgreen



Category: British Actor RPF, Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: F/M, flower shop au, hiring an actor, look-alike, pretend ex-relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-18
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2020-12-22 22:28:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21084122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neitherbluenorgreen/pseuds/neitherbluenorgreen
Summary: Mina meets an actor who's looking just like her ex. And her kids need a Dad.





	1. Chapter 1

Mina pushed the leaflet aside and sighed. Going on a holiday with her kids would be impossible this year. Money wasn’t the problem, but how should she wrangle a 6-year-old and 3-year-old twins and still be able to relax? The point of a vacation should be having a good time, not being even more stressed out.  
The bell above the store’s door chimed and she switched on her customer service smile, but as soon as she stepped around the paravent and saw her customer her face fell again. Before he could say anything, she raised both hands and shook her head.  
“There is nothing left here for you,” she greeted him, trying to sound firm and assertive, not letting any other emotion through.  
“Pardon?” He looked around the store in confusion. There was a tiny waiting area with a small coffee table and two comfy chairs, but apart from that the place was crammed with flowers. Bouquets of fresh flowers, arranged for different occasions, a display of dried flowers in the most vibrant colours, rows and rows of vases and pots and buckets overflowing with Lilac, Carnations, Foxglove, Freesia, Gardenia, Heather, Iris, different kinds of Lily, Dahlia, and a multitude more.  
“Yes, this is a flower shop and no, I know you’re not here for flowers,” Mina said, trying hard to keep her voice level and calm.  
“I’m not?” he replied, frowning at her. She could see a glint of anger in his eyes and she quickly looked away, not wanting to fuel his fire. But there was something off, about him. She looked him over to try to spot what was different. Tall, a bit on the lanky side, blond hair that insisted on curling, though it was kept short. His clothes were expensive, bespoke and tidy. Not a surprise exactly, though lately he had chosen more casual attires. He was clean shaven, which was a new sight and his hair was shorter than last time she had seen him, but rather than that… Still avoiding his eyes, she spotted a scar on his forehead. A little gasp escaped her when she realized it was an older scar, long since healed and not likely to disappear. John didn’t have such a scar.  
Realization hit her like a bucket of ice water. This wasn’t her ex-husband. This was a customer who just happened to look like an identical twin of his. She covered her mouth with her hands and took a step back, mortified.  
“I’m so sorry, sir. Oh my god, I confused you with somebody else,” she stammered. She felt the hot prick of tears of embarrassment rising and nestled for a handkerchief in her utility apron.  
“I don’t know how I could mistake you…,” she continued to babble, but surprise shut her up when the man gently placed a hand on her arm.  
“Don’t worry,” he said kindly. “No harm, no foul.” He carefully but insistently led her to one of the chairs and gestured her to sit down, then folded his tall frame in the seat opposite.  
“I’m really sorry,” Mina repeated after taking a deep breath. Looking at him again nearly set off a new wave of anxiety. He looked so much like John and not in a passing-glance kind of way. Even their mothers would have had trouble telling them apart. The differences were miniscule. Apart from the scar, he had more laughing lines around his mouth and the colour of his hair might have been a bit lighter, but otherwise shockingly similar.  
“Tell me about it,” he offered with a sincere smile.  
“Oh please, sir, I just mistook you for somebody else,” she started to say and was just about to rise, when he shook his head and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.  
“Unless you’re half blind – which I can’t imagine looking at those beautiful arrangements,” he gestured at the line of bouquets, “I really must look remarkably like somebody else. I would love to know who he is.”  
Mina raised an eyebrow, his calmness had centred her, but his concern felt strange.  
“But why would you be interested in that?” she asked.  
He rubbed his chin and a hint of sheepishness crept into his smile.  
“Two reasons, actually. First, I have a request for a bouquet that will take all your concentration and you do seem a little out of sorts right now. Talking will do you good.”  
He winked and added: “Purely selfish, I know.”  
She couldn’t help but smile. “And the second reason?” she prompted him.  
“Hu?” he paused for a moment. “The second reason was talking will do you good.”  
Mina shook her head and smiled. “No there’s something more, I can tell.” She didn’t say it out loud, but he looked just like her son when he had something more to say, but didn’t really want to.  
He coughed and then shrugged. “Caught, I guess. Actually, I’m an actor. I wasn’t playing a role when coming in, but something told you that I wasn’t this other person and I’m just wondering what…,” he paused, looking for words.  
“What gave you away?” she offered and smiled at the way he considered that word.  
“Ah, not really. It’s not like I wanted you to believe I am… whoever you thought I was.”  
Sobered she sighed again. She took a look at her watch, it was a late Tuesday afternoon and there was no rush of customers to be expected and he had hinted at buying something, so why not?  
“You remind me horribly of my ex-husband,” she began. His face fell, which made her smile again.  
“Horrible in a sense that your likeness is uncanny. You’re far more tidy and polite than him, at least.”  
He cleared his throat. “That sounds better, I guess. Are we really so much alike?” he asked.  
Mina laughed bitterly. “If I would show you the wedding picture you would wonder who erased your memory of marrying me.”  
“As if I could forget something like that,” he murmured. She shot him a look, but decided to ignore the comment.  
“He left me about one and a half years ago, coming back a few times to ask for favours or to rant at me,” she continued. “But for at least six months he just vanished from our lives.”  
“Our lives?” he asked.  
“We have a son and two daughters together. He was proud to have ‘produced issue’, but apart from that never seemed to really care for them, except when he thought he could use them to gain something from his parents.”  
The way she stressed the words, he could tell that a part of what she had said had been a direct quote, which made him wince. His face hardened at her last words.  
“It’s not my place to comment, but I’d say it’s rather good you got rid of him and I understand your reaction to me,” he said, his voice sober and honest.  
She couldn’t help but smile brightly at his words.  
“Thank you…,” she faltered and tilted her head.  
“William. Will. Please call me Will,” he supplied and offered his hand. She shook it and toll him her name.  
“So, Will, what kind of bouquet are you looking for?” she asked, rising and indicating the array of flowers.  
He also rose and there was again a sheepish grin on his face.  
“It’s supposed to say something along the lines of “Thank you so much, I really appreciate it and want to stay in contact, but this is in no way romantic”.” He coughed and smiled at her.  
“Is that possible?”  
She tipped her index finger against her pursed lips and thought for a moment.  
“I think I can make something for you.”

While Mina selected and cut flowers, they chatted about less loaded subjects. He was an actor, but most of his money came from small commercials and voice-overs. Mina didn’t say anything but wondered why nobody had discovered his handsomeness, but then he seemed a bit restrained, almost shy. If he hadn’t been so forward and asked her to tell her story, she might have found him cold. Right at the moment he was looking for a job, but his last engagement would keep him afloat for a while and pay for the flowers. He listened attentively for her explanation for her choice of flowers and seemed to be really interested. She explained that yellow carnations stand for rejection, so she added yellow roses accented with arborvitaes for friendship. For some lightness she chose white delphinium for joy and light-hearted fun topped it off with a few sprigs of lemon balm symbolizing loyalty and because she loved its fresh smell.  
When she presented him with the bouquet, she marvelled at how much she had enjoyed their chat. His calm and gentle nature had removed her thoughts of John, while their resemblance had eased her into a certain familiarity. For the first time, she looked him straight in the eyes and knew she’d never have trouble telling them apart again. While both men had blue eyes, Will’s were warm and kind. They were clear and light, but still intense.  
He was about to pay, when she grinned and said: “You’re still missing the most important thing”.  
Startled, Will looked at the flowers he was holding. “I am?”  
“Of course!” She took out a plain white card, a pen and pushed them towards him. “The flowers can mean anything and the only thing she won’t misunderstand are clear words.”  
“I guess you’re right. I really like these, but they’re still a veil to keep me from having to say it.”  
“You don’t have to write “You’re not sexy, just keep me in the loop”,” Mina said with a grin. “How about something like “Thank you for being such a loyal friend? It’s clear and you don’t have to spell out the awkward things.”  
He nodded thoughtfully. “I guess that’s the best advice I’ve gotten lately,” he said, more to himself. “And giving her flowers and being there shows that I care, right?”  
Mina’s equilibrium faltered. He had involuntarily echoed her words to John, in their last fight. She had told him that he had to be there to show their children he cared for them, to which he had replied that his absence should tell her something.  
Will looked at her alarmed. “I said something wrong, didn’t I?”  
She shook her head. “You just said something so very obvious that I didn’t understand myself for a long time. John not being there for his kids, showed that he didn’t care. A good Dad, a Dad that they’d deserved would have made time.” She sighed. “But I really don’t want to take up all your time with my problems. Even though I’m thankful you listened.”  
He nodded. “I think every child deserves a Dad who’s there for them. I know it’s not always possible, but from what I gathered, he’d had the chance if he’d wanted. He’s just a sire, not a Dad.”  
Something in his words gave Mina an idea. She looked him over with a calculating eye. Her kids hadn’t seen their father that much and her side of the family sometimes had a hard time keeping one white Englishman from the next anyhow. It would only be a few days here and there and she could pay him well. She cleared her throat and asked:  
“If you’re looking for an acting job, how about being the Dad of my children?”  



	2. Chapter 2

Fiddling with her phone and wondering again if this had really been a good idea, Mina scanned the parking lot outside the small café they had chosen to meet at. It was part of a chain of bakeries, nothing fancy or especially inviting and far enough from her neighbourhood that she was sure that she wouldn’t meet anybody she knew. Checking the time again, she rolled her eyes. It was still a quarter of an hour before the time they had agreed on and she had already been here for ten minutes. It gave her time to mull things over in her head to a point where she had no idea anymore what to think.   
Will had reacted surprised to her proposal and had asked for time to sleep on it. They had exchanged numbers and by the next morning, Mina had been certain the idea was stupid. When Will called her, however, he was so enthusiastic about it. It wasn’t about playing a role he had said; it was about the kids. Giving them a chance to move on if nothing else. They agreed to meet a week later, giving both of them time to puzzle out what they thought they’d need and then talk about it. By the day before Mina had been certain that it would be better to call it all off. She had prepared a cheque for Will to compensate for his time and cancelling the job, but then one of the twins had sleepily asked her where Dad was as she tugged her in.   
A friendly “Hello!” woke her from her reverie. Looking up, she saw Will jogging towards her with a smile on his face. His clothes were far more casual today but still tidy and – she noticed amused – obviously freshly pressed.   
He greeted her with a firm handshake and opened the door to the café for her. On her way to the counter she told herself not to think of Will only in opposition to John, even if it was a striking contrast of how his politeness seemed genuine and natural instead of John’s forced pleasantries. She wouldn’t be comfortable with nor wanted Will imitating John. He wasn’t supposed to stand the scrutiny of any grown-up who knew John better, just act like a Dad for a few hours.   
They ordered coffee and sat down at a small table towards the back of the room. After sharing a few pleasantries, Mina took out her folder. Will laughed.  
“Oh! Homework!” he exclaimed. Upon seeing Mina’s embarrassed expression, he clarified immediately: “I’m impressed you came prepared. A lot of meetings talking about a role are horrible vague and you leave with more comparisons to other roles than what you’re actually supposed to play.”  
Mollified, Mina took out a check-list and a picture of her kids.   
“I’m actually a bit touchy about being told I’m over-prepared,” she started. “But I think best when I can structure beforehand what I want to say.”  
He smiled and nodded at her to go on.   
“I think it’s best to tell you more about the marriage and the children. I won’t go into too much detail, maybe we’ll decide that it’s not feasible after all.”  
“Very prudent. I guess you changed your opinion of if this is a good idea or not a few times this past week?” he asked.  
Mina coughed. “You already know me too well, it seems,” she said drily but smiled at him.   
“Okay, here we go – but even the short version will be long,” she started and recounted her history with John.   
They had met when they were still children, she was 7 and he was 9. Her mother had a job as a cleaning lady in one of John’s parents’ town houses. She was exorbitantly over-qualified but as a recent immigrant, her English had still been accented and it was more important to earn money than to work in her profession as a radiation therapist, especially since Mina’s father was still in India at that time. John’s parents, Emily and John Sr. were generous and soon discovered that Mina’s mum was educated and helped her get a better job. She still babysat John from time to time and often brought Mina.   
The both of them got along fairly well after a rather rocky start. John’s former nanny had, contrary to what his parents believed, instilled a certainty of superiority in him. Men were better than women, rich better than poor and of course English natives better than the whole world. His parents were dismayed when they began to see this in him and hoped that exposure to Mina would teach him to be better. It seemed to work, too. He was fascinated that Mina was as intelligent as him, if not more so and had a mind of her own. In retrospect she sometimes wondered if he was actually a psychopath and was just fascinated by her, later using her to play house to pacify his parents.   
After some time apart them met again when Mina was 21. They dated for a while, but broke it off before it got too serious. They rekindled their relationship shortly after her 24th birthday. It took a long while for Mina to see through his duplicity. He was charming and seemed to care, then suddenly decide that she was too time consuming or needy. He’d come crawling back and apologize only to revert to coldness after a while. Mina had been on the brink of ghosting him for good when she found out she was pregnant. After an initial shock and denial, when he claimed he wasn’t the father, John suddenly became a different person. He read books on pregnancy and fulfilled her every wish. It was soon decided that they’d marry before she’d show too much. In retrospect, she couldn’t quite say who had decided it. Their parents? Herself? When Simon was born, John was a proud father and a doting husband. It lasted a few months, then he got antsy and suddenly needed to travel for work. So far, his job at a bank had not required him to travel, but Mina had believed everything he said.   
Mina relished being a mum. She was very lucky to have her parents and sister to help her when she needed it. John’s parents had insisted on buying a house in her name – she had tried to talk them out of it, but they had been adamant. It had to be in her name, not John’s nor Simon’s. They also set up a trust fund for Simon and generally did everything they could so she wouldn’t lack for anything. Maybe they had known that their son wouldn’t proof to be reliable after all.   
Caught up in her joy of being a mother, Mina had not seen or maybe ignored that John became more and more distant. He was away most of the time, spending more time with associates or colleagues than with his family. She liked her freedom and the comfy life she had, but when Simon turned 3 and John didn’t show, she confronted him. He was very apologetic, but also noncommitting, telling her he was sorry and that Simon wouldn’t remember it anyhow.   
Before Mina could decide what to do, she became pregnant again. It shouldn’t have been possible, since John had claimed he had gotten a vasectomy and she had been talking the pill for other reasons than contraception, but – in John’s words – the miracle happened. Due to the timing she suspected him of having a hand in this, but she couldn’t prove it. This time the honey-moon-phase was far shorter. She didn’t notice it immediately, but he began pulling back, leaving them alone again. Simon was old enough to know something was wrong, so he started to avoid John even if he was there. To her surprise, John didn’t seem to mind. He behaved more like a roommate than a husband and she discovered that he was having an affair. She kicked him out, but couldn’t bear to not let him be there when Olivia and Alice were born and he wormed his way back into their house. In the usual pattern, he was charming for a while and then vanished for a month without telling anybody where he was.   
Amidst a sad son, two babies crying and her sister telling her to wake up, she finally realized that he wasn’t the husband or father she hoped he would be. She had a barrister draw up the paperwork and presented him with a divorce when he finally came back.  
To her surprise, he agreed immediately. They discussed terms in a civilized manner and he even visited from time to time, playing with the kids. Her sister had moved in, partly to help her, but mostly because she could commute from there to work and didn’t have to pay rent or endure their parents’ life advice every day. It seemed as it would turn out fairly well, until she got a call from her ex-mother-in-law. Still being on very good terms, Mina was used to getting a call or visit from time to time, mainly so Emily and her husband could see their grand-children. But this call was different. Something had happened between John and his father, but she wouldn’t say what exactly. There had been a huge fight and money was involved and Emily warned Mina to be very careful around John. Only later did Mina hear that John had actually knocked out his father.   
When he visited shortly after, a friend of Mina’s “just happened” to drop by shortly after and he managed to throw John out when he got violent after Mina didn’t let him take the kids “on a holiday”. He came back a few times to find the locks had changed and screamed obscenities on the lawn. During the last year, he had been to visit from time to time, with Mina always being very careful not to be alone or leave the children in his care. They had found a kind of equilibrium until, about six months ago, when he tried to steal from her house and had threatened to take the children away from her. Since then, not a word, card or anything. Neither had his parents had any communication with him. 

When she finished recounting her story, Mina looked at the table, not quite willing to meet Will’s eyes.   
It was the first time that he had told the whole story to anybody. While the people closest to her knew most of it, she tried to keep everybody who was not family ignorant. Even her parents only knew bits and pieces. Her sister might be the only one who had the full picture, and now Will, a complete stranger.   
She noticed him getting up, but instead of fleeing from her and her mad life, he went to the counter to get their drinks refilled.   
After he sat back down, he was the first to start talking.   
“Your kids don’t really know their father that well, right?” he asked, his face earnest. Mina searched his eyes for apprehension or judgment, but all she found was kindness. She nodded.   
“I think the twins do remember him, but he’s almost an abstract figure. They know from stories and other children what a Dad is supposed to be like and they know that John was meant for that role,” she shrugged. “Simon knows him better. He even has fond memories, but they are few and he doesn’t talk about him at all.”  
“So, what do you wish their Dad – my role – to be like?” he inquired. “You don’t want to keep me around until they are 18, right?”  
From the mirth sparkling in his eyes, Mina could tell that the last part was neither meant to pressure nor to shame her.   
“Honestly, I don’t even know if John might be coming back after all,” she admitted. “But I think it would be nice for the children to have a few good memories with him. And I think Simon deserves an explanation.”  
Will nodded.   
“It might sound strange, but I’d like to describe the role I have in mind for you. I’ll just call him Dad, okay?” he asked and Mina nodded. “Keep in mind, I’m not describing John.”  
Will looked thoughtful, composing himself, brows slightly furrowed and tipped his right index finger against his lower lip. Fascinated Mina watched how his posture changed, how he slipped into his role. Before he started speaking, he had relaxed into a slouching position, his butt on the edge of the chair and his right ankle resting on top of the left knee. He grabbed his mug from the table, cradling it in his hands, fiddling with the handle. His eyes were hooded and didn’t look at her directly.  
“Dad is a young guy who regrets marring to early and who’s afraid of the responsibility of having kids,” he began. His voice had changed, sounding a bit higher than he spoke normally, with a slight twang of a posh accent. “But at the same time, he loves his kids and wants them to be happy. He’s realized that being out of their lives completely isn’t was best for them and at least wants to explain why he’s less around. He’s probably thinking about making a new start somewhere else, but doesn’t want to just leave.”  
Straightening back up, he grinned at Mina. “This is just a first idea,” he said, back in his own voice.   
Mina beamed at him. “That’s actually super impressive,” she said. “It’s not John, but it’s close enough and pretty much to what I’d hoped Dad to be.”  
Will beamed back at her.   
They agreed he’d have a first go the next Saturday, just dropping off something at the house and exchanging some words with Mina. She’d make sure the kids saw her being relaxed around him and they could talk about when he’d come around again right there.


	3. Chapter 3

The kitchen practically sparkled by the time Mina had managed to channel enough of her nervous energy into cleaning so she wouldn’t pace the living room. Simon still shot her some suspicious looks from his favourite spot on the love-seat in the living room whenever she bustled through.

When the door-bell rang, it was ten minutes past the time they had agreed on, which seemed very in-character for “Dad”. Bemused Mina went to open the door, being greeted by a bouquet of yellow roses. 

“I’m sorry!” Will said, as Mina took the flowers. “I wanted to be here on time, but got stuck in traffic.”  
He winked at her and she shook her head. “Typical!”  
“Exactly,” he muttered under his breath and she gave him a thumps-up. He looked good, if untypically dishevelled. His hair was mussed and his cargo pants had obviously never seen an iron. His t-shirt was also rather crinkly and she even spotted a small coffee-stain on the lower half.   
“Do I pass muster?” he asked, his voice still low. Mina nodded and smiled. Then she took a deep breath and called “Simon, come on! Your Dad’s here!”  
After a moment, Simon’s head appeared around the living room door. With huge eyes he looked between Mina and Will.   
Mina nodded at him. “It’s okay, honey. Your Dad and I agreed to try and be friendly.”  
Simon still held back.   
“I’ll put the flowers into a vase,” she added and left for the kitchen, hoping Simon would trust that this meant it was okay to talk to “Dad”.   
Will crouched down and looked at Simon, who nervously nibbled on a finger.   
“Hey, buddy,” he said lightly. “I know I’ve not been around much, but I hoped to talk to you for a bit.”  
Simon kept starring at him, then said in a small voice: “Can Mummy be there?”  
“Of course! Let’s wait in the living room, okay?”

Mina found them sitting across from each other in the living room. Simon was perched on the love-seat, ready to bolt anytime and Will had draped himself over the sofa, taking up more space than it should be possible for such a slim man. His face was thoughtful, but he didn’t look directly at Simon. The boy however didn’t look away from the man for a second. He looked unsure and nervous. Mina sat down in the armchair sitting between them. It was pushed back enough so she would be visible from the corner of Simon’s eye, giving him some security, but also signalizing that she would let father and son speak alone.   
Will smiled at her reassuringly and she smiled back, astonished how well she was able to tell apart “Dad” and Will. It was as if she could watch him step back into his role and turn to Simon. Her son was looking at them a bit confused. It must have been a while since he saw them smiling at each other sincerely. Before she could decipher her feelings, “Dad” began to speak.   
“So, your mum and I talked about if maybe it would be good for us to talk, you know?”  
Simon just stared at him.   
“There are a lot of things I did wrong and I would like to explain them to you.”   
There was a bit of surprise on Simon’s face. He had been told by his aunt and grand-parents that his father had been a bad parent and made mistakes, but it must sound very differently coming from the grown-up himself. He nodded slowly.   
“Okay.”  
“If it’s alright with you, I’d like to come over once or twice, so you can ask me whatever you want.”  
Simon’s eyes darted over to his mother and she nodded at him. Simon bit his lip.   
“Okay.”  
“I guess I’ll let you go back to playing again now, buddy.” Will smiled sadly. “Maybe talk to your mum and think of thinks you want to ask?”  
“Okay.”  
Simon’s bewilderment was obvious and when Mina told him to go on, he fled from the sitting room. They heard his door slam shut.   
“I should talk to him,” Mina said. She bit her lip. “Maybe this was a mistake? He looked so miserable.”  
Will sighed deeply. “I have to admit, I didn’t think he would be so terrified of me. Did John hit him?”  
Mina stared at him, taken aback. “No!” After a pause she admitted: “I don’t know. He saw him on the lawn, screaming about how I was a pathetic gold-digging whore. I had hoped that was… enough?”  
The question in her voice made Will stand up and walk over to her. Crouching next to the armchair, he took her hands.   
“You’re doing a great job. It must be super confusing to him. If you think it’s a bad idea, we can just stop. But I think it might confuse him even more.”  
Mina took a shaky breath and blinked away tears.   
Will put his hand on her shoulder comfortingly. “You’re doing your best. Just talk to him and if he says he doesn’t want to talk to “Dad” there’s your answer.”

They said good-bye and Mina told him she’d call him during the week to talk about how to continue. She stood at the door, watching him walk away, when she heard somebody call her name in an angry voice.   
Her sister descended on her like a wrathful goddess, with two happy cherubim in tow.   
“Did you send me to the playground with the twins so I wouldn’t know he was here?”  
Anna’s voice was shaking from barely contained fury, almost spitting out the “he”. Mina ushered her and the kids in and shook her head.   
“Please, let’s do this later. Can you clean up the girls? I need to talk to Simon.”  
With a huff, Anna let her go and went to the bathroom to get the mud off of Alice and Olivia. 

Mina knocked on Simon’s door and opened it after a moment without response. She stuck her head inside and asked: “May I come in?”  
“Only you?” Simon asked and she spotted him behind his bed, peeking over the blankets.   
“Only me.”  
“Okay then.”  
Mina sat down on the floor beside him, leaning against the bed. Uneasily she thought about he had insisted it was to be placed with only the head-board against a wall. It had seemed like he just wanted it to have the room split up into two halves, but maybe it was to make sure he couldn’t be cornered?   
For a moment she just watched him sorting his Legos. He always started a new project by choosing which tiles he would need and lining them up. He said it was so he could concentrate on building and didn’t have to search during construction.   
“Do you want me to help you sort?” she asked.   
“You can get the clear plastic ones.”  
They sat a while in silence, building small mounds of Legos in peace. Then Simon asked: “Will you and Dad marry again?”  
Mina gasped. “What? No! He really just wants to talk to you.”  
Simon fell silent for a little while.   
“He never used to talk much to me. We played games or kicked the ball or something.”  
“I think he realized that he wasn’t really good at being a Dad and wants to make sure you don’t think it’s your fault.”  
“It’s not?”  
Mina took the Legos from Simon’s hand and pulled him close.   
“No baby. Never your fault. Your Dad and I just didn’t fit well together. It was like building a Lego-house with Playmobil bricks. It can work, but it’s unstable.”  
Simon nodded.   
“If you don’t want to talk to him, he won’t come back. I will not get back together with him.”  
Simon hugged her, but looked relieved.   
“You don’t even have to decide right now. Let’s talk tomorrow or the day after. If you ever feel uncomfortable at all, I won’t let him near you, okay?  
“Okay.”


	4. Chapter 4

Mina called Will on Tuesday to tell him that Simon had decided that he wanted to talk to “Dad”. They exchanged greetings and Will asked how Simon was doing, which brought Mina right to the point. 

“He thought I was getting back together with John and that really frightened him.”

“I was floored by how nervous he was alone with me. I know you don’t like to hear this, but…”

“I know. I have no idea and I don’t know if it would be a good idea to talk to him about that. Unless he starts?”

“And what am I supposed to say?” Will sounded more and more exasperated. “I’m not sure I can handle that.”

“So far, his questions are what you are doing right now, if you want to come back and why you went away.”

There was a pause.

“You don’t have to do this, you know? I don’t even know why I thought this was a good idea,” Mina said softly, so low that Will wasn’t sure what emotion lay underneath.

“I want to do this, Mina.”

“You do?”

“Simon is a great kid and you… you’re doing a great job and it’s hard for you. I want to help.”

“Maybe I should have asked a child-therapist.”

Will was taken aback. He didn’t know why he was feeling so rejected, after all this was a job. Sure, he liked Mina and it seemed to be a good cause. He cleared his throat.

“If you don’t want me to come around again, it’s okay.”

“No!” Mina cried. “That’s not what I meant! I think Simon really needs this. Even if it is just to hear that it’s not his fault from your… from “Dad’s” mouth, too.”

“And if anything sounds fishy, you’ll try a therapist?” Will asked almost rhetorically, thinking he was just finishing her line of thought. But after he said it, he realized that he would insist, if Simon said anything to him that rubbed him wrong.

“I’m thinking of doing that anyhow. Even if that opens up another can of worms.” She snorted. “By the way, we’ll have to meet on neutral ground. My sister saw you leaving and if you had not been so far away, she might have whooped your ass.”

Will grinned. “I think I already like her. So, you want to meet at a park?”

“Good idea. Are you free Sunday afternoon? My parents want to take the twins to their cousin’s birthday party and Anna has a date I think.”

“Ha, it sounds as if we’re planning an illicit affair.”

“I know! Maybe I’ll gather the guts to tell Anna, but right now…”

“It’s our little secret. Our squeaky-clean little secret.”

Mina laughed. She could imagine Will saying this, his eyes mirthful. It was easy to talk to him on the phone, his voice didn’t sound like John’s at all this way. It probably didn’t sound much like it anyhow, but their uncanny resemblance created the illusion it did.

They agreed on a place and time, giving Mina enough time to get there and back again before her parents would return without having to rush Simon’s talk to “Dad”.

To her great relief, Anna was busy with work and her evening courses and had accepted the flimsy excuse that John had just dropped something off. Her sister had commented on how thoughtful Simon had been in the following days, telling Mina to not let John back in.

Though Anna and Simon got along well, he didn’t confide in her. Much like his mother, he was rather quiet and Anna’s temper and energy matched the twins’ personality far better. They loved each other, but Mina had the feeling that he thought Anna didn’t understand him. It might even be true: Anna had often wondered why Simon would stay inside to play instead of going outside. His interest in ancient Egypt seemed macabre to her and he preferred to be alone. Mina figured that, if Anna had not been nearly eight years younger than Mina, they’d probably have been fighting all through their childhood. She wondered how Simon, Olivia and Alice would feel when they grew older. The twins had a special bond, but they adored their elder brother. He cared for them and tried from the beginning to help as much as he could, though a three-year-old wasn’t exactly a baby-sitter. Lately their playtime got a little too rowdy for Simon, who disliked loud voices. Time would tell how they’d get along.

The week seemed to fly by and it soon was Sunday. Anna left for her date – a day at the British museum, which didn’t sound like her at all – and the twins were on their way to the birthday party. Simon seemed calm, but he held Mina’s hand while they walked to the park. Since he had started school, he often didn’t want to hold hands, feeling it was too childish, but today he was the one to take Mina’s hand first.

When they arrived at the playground they had chooses as a meeting point, Will was already there. He waved at them and they joined him on the bench he was sitting on.

After they exchanged their hellos, there was a moment of awkward silence.

“Do you want me to go to the other bench?” Mina asked Simon, gesturing to a bench that would just be out of earshot if they didn’t talk to loud.

Simon looked at Will and shook his head. “Would you stay?” he asked in a small voice.

Mina hugged him and looked at Will over her son’s head. Will’s brow was furrowed with concern, but when their eyes met, he flashed her an encouraging smile.

“So, buddy, how’s school?” “Dad” started the conversation, hoping an easy topic would smooth things a bit.

“It’s okay.” Simon looked at his mother, who nodded and smiled. He glanced at “Dad” who was looking at him expectantly.

“The teachers are nice, but sometimes it’s boring.”

“That probably means you’re clever,” “Dad” said with a proud smile. Simon shrugged.

“Are you going to school, too?” Simon asked. Mina smirked at Will’s surprised face. For Simon it was normal that some adults still went to school – Anna went to an adult education centre and a friend of Mina’s was doing her Master’s degree at the moment.

“I’m actually having a bit of free time right now,” “Dad” said, like they had planned. “My boss at work wants me to go to America and has giving me some time off, to organize things.”

“America?” Simon asked, sounding interested.

“Yeah, I’ll be moving to Boston and work there.”

“It’s rather far away, though, right?”

Will considered the question – was Simon hoping he would be far away or would he want him to be closer?

“Well, it’s not as hard to get there anymore, some people fly back and forth every week.” He took a breath, getting no clue from Simon, who just looked mildly interested. “I’ll be working a lot, though, so I won’t be coming to England often.”

Simon nodded, neither overly relieved nor sad.

“What are you doing there?”

Will vaguely described an office job in the financial branch and talked about internet commerce, until he sensed Simon’s attention wandering.

He asked Simon a few questions about school, learning that he liked art and history and had found a group of friends easily. The boy seemed far more relaxed and even smiled as he talked about his week.

After a while, Mina looked at her phone and realized they would have to leave soon. “Dad” looked a bit sad at the announcement, but Simon more or less shrugged it off. He seemed okay with talking to “Dad”, but wasn’t really invested that much. A bit like when Mina’s aunt came over and talked to him. He was patient and pretty polite for a six-year-old, but wouldn’t mind getting away to play.

When Mina asked if Simon wanted to ask anything else, the boy just shook his head.

“Well, then it’s time to leave, I guess?” “Dad” said and smiled at Simon. He remained sitting when Mina and Simon got up.

“So, do you think it would be a good idea if I came to see Olivia and Alice, before… before I leave?” he asked Mina.

“I’m not sure,” she replied. “I think I will talk about it with Anna.”

Will raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Okay. Call me?”

“Will do,” she smiled at him, more genuine than her smile had been all day.

Directed at Simon, he ventured a “Do I get a hug?” 

To his and Mina’s surprise, Simon nodded without checking with his mum and went over to wrap his arms around “Dad’s” neck. It was almost over before “Dad” could pat the boy’s back.

Will looked after the both of them as they walked away. Why had this touched him so much?


End file.
